England: The Hunt for Hot Gold II

In the year of your mother's Lord 1875, on the 10th of the rather confused month of February, Michael Fez and I were once again strolling along the cobbled streets of merry old London Town. It seemed that even though the Queen Victoria valued us enough to send an invitation to us while in that wretched hell hole on the continent, she did not want to secure us a carriage or other conveyance. Truly, the British matriarch is a woman wiser than I, for I can not see this as anything but an insult. Being royalty, she would never do anything insulting though, so it can't be an insult. Nope. Even though I did step in the droppings of a dog and Fez was mugged three times, I am most certain that this was not an insult in any way. Then again, the last time Fez and I were in London, we did light the throne on fire. I am most certain that she has forgiven us for that though. Yes.
After a quick trip to the surgeon so that Fez could get a few sutures and stop complaining about carrying his intestines around in his hands, we arrived at Buckingham Palace to be escorted into the Queen's private Chamber of Commerce and Science. Not many people know that there is such a chamber in the palace, and that is because the general citizenry of the British Isles simply can not handle the thought of a room devoted to both science and commerce at once. Then again, most of the general citizenry can not handle the thought of Swiss cheese, and they do not seem to know much any way. At any rate, both Fez and I were there, in the presence of Her Majesty and Her greatest scholars and astronomers. We were given a long lecture about just what the sun was, how far away it was, how big it was, and what it was made of, but I shall only write out the finer points here.
The sun is big and the sun is round. It is also bright yellow, and very shiny. Just as the earth is made up of various minerals, so too must the sun be. But, due to the sun's solid color, it is reasonable to assume that the sun is made up of one element, and one element alone. Due to it's coloration, it is also reasonable to assume that that solitary element is pure gold. It was the Queens plan to send an expedition of every one in the room, excluding Her royal self, to the sun so that we might harvest that gold as well take scientific readings.
After She had finished, the chamber was filled with mutterings and the occasional clapping. In the din, I turned to Fez with a somewhat worried look, only to see his was shining with anticipation.
"Fez, you fool," I said quietly, taking him by the shoulder and pulling him close to me. "We can't go to the sun! We've got to get Russia for the Czar's marriage or we'll lose our heads!"

"If we don't go to the sun," Fez countered, turning to look at me. "Then we might well lose our heads here as well, and since we are already here, we might as well enjoy this one. I hate weddings anyway."

Though I found his hat to be silly, my colleague was right. If we denied either one, we might well die, so we might as well take the one in front of us. Therefore, when the Queen left us all to get to work, Fez and I stood up and grabbed the nearest scribe. Following is the list of materials needed to make the vessel that would carry us all to the sun.

Steel (20 tonnes)

Oak (2 tonnes)

Clear Glass (10ftX10ftX2ft)

Copper Piping (400ft)

Large Copper Boilers (5)

Rivets (1000+)

Nails (2500+)

Glue (50gal)

Cow (1)